CULT OF GENESIS: January 2007

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

GUILT OF SOLITUDE

A friendly company... Or a loving company of someother being is pretty much a luxury for a few handful of us humans have for all day long, or least... most of the time.

But there are so much many times where one feels so lonesome as of an utterly dark cloud of solitude hovering over their inner souls. The darkness so strong that one cannot see through, solitude so tense that leaves one's heart pounding recklessly against an imaginary iron wall, desperate to seek someones aid, thirsty to hear the slightest cling of any sound.And then the final question of why... jumps into one's mind.

Why would one feel such a terrible feeling? Even those who have the least luxury of good friendship at often intervals in their lives? Even yet the feeling crawls them over their back without knowing that it is and drown them deep into its dark black whole....These are the definite set of questions and thoughts that would run through each and everyone's minds. So many questions as to why such a dark lonesome feeling haunts them, and as to why that feeling wont go by nd vanish into time.

But then a few of them finally come to realize that they themselves are the ones to blame for the feeling itself. coming to finally conclude that its either a singular or combined effect of their personality, actions, and judgement that brings about all this.

For those who all who never end up with a clue as to why... Can judge themselves lucky, as it is surely a far more dark, heavy and bitter fact to gulp down that ones own solitude is of ones own to blame, indeed the guilt of solitude.

Posted by Ahmed Rishwan at 2:38 AM | Permalink | Comments

Saturday, January 20, 2007

To Be And To Be Come: Definitely Two Different Things

When ever I get my time alone, (which is mostly the case)... struck hard by the extract of my boredom, coming to finally wonder whether the world would ever miss me, let alone the world, would anyone come to miss me if I just happen to vanish into the thin air. But then again when the reality comes hitting hard on me that thats not a possibility just to vanish like that but still the world nor a person would miss me even if it happened to be so, I question myself... "What did I want to be? and What have I become?"... Don't you?

You see, think, back in your days you would have definitely would have wanted to be someone else or something else from what you have become, right? For me, I surely remember the times when I used to attend my primary schooling grades that whenever I see and airplane... I would yell to anyone next to me.... "I WILL BE A PILOT SOARING THE SKIES ALL DAY LONG!!!!" But that was hardly the case, as I came to see the those wishes of the person I want to be come to a solid halt when I was pretty much forced to choose a vividly different area of study by my...ummm.. well.... yeah... you guessed right.

And now that I am here sitting in this chair and typing all this down, from all the times in life from where I have come to question myself the same question over and over again... "What did I want to be? and What have I become?" I surely did know the answer of the first question. But I quite couldn't figure out the answer to the last one, all that I know is the answer to that is definitely not the same as to the first one. But I always wondered... why couldn't the answer to both of them be the same? matter of fact? why couldn't it happen? and if things didn't happen the way they did, would I still be this same person? in the same place? or just would it mean or bring about any difference? Would my being the person i wanted "to be" is what I have "become".... bring about any change to the way others think of me?

Questions, Questions and more questions comes up as I think of this, but hehehe! I can't help it. In all these years of my life I have only come to be sure of one definite thing on the issue of To be and to Become, and I got news for anyone who have been saying that its one thing. Here it is... "HEY YO!!! NO IT'S NOT... ITS TWO "VERY" DIFFERENT THINGS!!!!"

Posted by Ahmed Rishwan at 7:14 AM | Permalink | Comments

Grim Reaper: Death Personified

The Grim Reaper is the physical Incarnation of death; the reaper of human souls. General lore and legend depict the Grim Reaper, or Death with a capital D, as a skeleton shrouded in a black cloak, weilding a crooked old farming scythe which he uses to separate souls from bodies. He is also said to go about his business riding a great white horse.

While the above is generally accepted as the image of Death, there are a few points about death which many groups disagree with.

 Death's Nature: Is Death good, evil, or neutral? Death is portrayed in some stories as a compassionate doctor, who just does what he has to do to relieve the pain and suffering of the dying. In other stories, he has no feeling at all, just a ghost who goes around doing his job because he is eternally damned to do so, and the other version of Death where he is a creation of Satan, who is evil and likes to reap souls just for the sake of being evil.

 Death's Appointments: Does Death come personally to oversee the evicting of souls of every human being, or does he only come to certain people of importance, or whose good and evil hang in the balance and need to be carefully sorted? Does he appear visible to the victim (or patient as some would say) and what about his close ones, will they see Death, or will he be invisible? In many stories, Death only comes to take the souls of certain people of importance. In the Discworld by Terry Pratchett, Death only appears to Wizards. In Incarnations of Immortality by Piers Anthony, Death only comes to personally claim humans who are hanging in the balance between good and evil. In other versions, Death makes appointments with anyone who is alive (however this is more difficult to understand since there are literally thousands of people dying each minute).

However, the general idea is the same... Death is the collector of Souls and he is the bell-boy of the afterlife, however much more respected and feared. His power is known by everyone. And eventually, everyone also gets to know him

Posted by Ahmed Rishwan at 6:46 AM | Permalink | Comments

Friday, January 19, 2007

Waiting: the Façade of Impatience

It seems rather far-fetched to say that waiting happens to be the first step to impatience but actually its very much not so. Or in other words, it could be said as the outward layer of impatience itself. Whichever way it is they both come from the same category. Or at least relate to each other... don't they?

Lets imagine that one has someone special in ones life. And being to wait for this special person to give a call, or to come on a certain time. Ain't there the waiting involved? but thought the time does not necessarily come by, next thing one knows is that one is extremely impatient for the even to come into being.

So simply said, waiting leads to being impatient. Thus waiting believe it or not, is the façade of impatience. Just think, waiting for the bus, or the waiting for the school bell to ring for the end of the session. More over the waiting for the coffee time break at office. Its all the same, just impatience coursing its veins through the simple cause of our waiting.

And yet they all say to be patient, when they all find themselves at the very same place, every single day.

Ironic isn't it?

Posted by Ahmed Rishwan at 4:43 AM | Permalink | Comments

Saturday, January 6, 2007

Back from a Break from my Routine Life

Aha! back from a great trip I am. It was indeed great fun. Too bad I could not get any pictures cos hehehe... almost everyone readying for the picnic forgot about the damn camera all the way to the resort. (well technically not a resort... but I was one before until it got closed down).

It was in years that i had seen so much people in one place having fun like that. Truly and overwhelming feeling. You should have been there, I bet even the one standing and watching would have found it worth his/her time. heheheh!

And to add more... all ma friends ( i mean to say all the boys) slept in one room. (then again, its obvious we won't be sleeping) instead of sleeping we were beating the shit out of each other... and playing pranks most of the time. What a night that was! heheh.

More over to our surprise we had an added extra night to stay on the island cos we only got one speed boat to make a shift on the day we all planned to come back to the busy life of male :P .... ( do know much about whether that was a good thing or a bad thing :S ) but all i know is we had a good night sleep... and lots of great meals during the day till we sped towards Male' after a big Lunch.

So now, I am back in my usual life... sorta boring though... but heck of a time pass actually, you never know that you are missing a love life when you are in my shoes.. heheh.. cos you would be just too darn busy... all the way from day till late midnight.

But then again. Its not too good or bad as well.... but i don't know why, for some stupid reason... I just need a way to break off from this cycle and find a much more involving, happy and realist pattern of life. Shit.. maybe my thoughts are turning into Adult Thoughts. Jeez... thats the other thing.. I don wanna grow up and get old too fast...

Well see ya all around.

Posted by Ahmed Rishwan at 3:07 AM | Permalink | Comments

Tuesday, January 2, 2007

Same routine day

Another day is passing by, nothing new to be blabbering about. One would be wondering now that my life is very routine. And if that is the case I must say that I agree, my life is very routine, lonely you could say it, I do not deny the fact, but sure as hell beat the odds of being occupied and busted up in a relationship.

But then again, there are times that I wish that I was not lonely. Sometimes I find myself desperate to grab any hand put forward but then, that would be cheap coming from me. This would indeed denounce that I am a man of principle. There are certain rules I follow in life both in my career, and my own personal side. Maybe thats the thing keeping me from having a fun life, then again, I just think that if I tend to loose control of my own obligations, I just might not end up anywhere in my life.

Anyways, I think I will watch a movie for the night and call it a day. See ya all later.
Later as in tomorrow.

Chao!

Posted by Ahmed Rishwan at 6:56 AM | Permalink | Comments

Genesis of My Own

It's been a very long time since I have been hearing of these things called blogs. I never gave much attention to find out what they were for years. I was not much of a surfer back then. But now that I have a good job, with unlimited resources... I thought I will give this thing a try. But before I do that, I went around some few blogs myself just to see what all the buzz is about.

Once I did all that, its all so appealing. So many ways to express ones self, feelings. And moreover a ton of shared information. Hints and tips. and lots more... thus I too now begin to express myself and help with all my knowledge to the whole community.

Adios!

Posted by Ahmed Rishwan at 2:51 AM | Permalink | Comments

CULT OF GENESIS

The Sect of all First Steps